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Marital Freedom: The liberty that allows a husband to do exactly that which his wife pleases.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do you mean?" responded her mother. "Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came back with another.".
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like what you are getting.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon them.
Topic: Men and Women
Source: None
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LSD melts your mind, not in your hand.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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No one is listening until you make a mistake.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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One thing you can't recycle is wasted time.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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If you think before you speak the other guy gets its joke in first.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Sex is like snow... You never know how many inches you're going to get or how long it will last.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Marriage is like the army. Everybody complains, but you'd be surprised at how many re-enlist.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Live every day as if it were your last and then some day you'll be right.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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There is one thing more exasperating than a spouse who can cook and won't, and that's a spouse who can't cook and will.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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There is no remedy for sex but more sex.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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If ignorance is bliss, why aren't there more happy people?
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Living in the past has one thing in its favor - it's cheaper.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Happiness: An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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With clothes the new are best, with friends the old are best.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Nothing succeeds like -- failure.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Reality is good for you...in small doses.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Sometimes it's useful to know how large your zero is.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law; and every time they make a law it's a joke.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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The universe is laughing behind your back.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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My way of joking is to tell the truth; it's the funniest joke in the world.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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The thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble is sex.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Like most endeavors, life is seriously over-advertised and under-funded.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Modesty: the gentle art of enhancing your charm by pretending not to be aware of it.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Trouble brings experience, and experience brings wisdom.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, humidity, and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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To laugh at men of sense is the privilege of fools.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Virtue is its own reward, but then so is sin!
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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In marriage, as in war, it is permitted to take every advantage of the enemy.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Your ignorance cramps my conversation.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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People can travel faster than sound, yes, but not nearly so fast as rumor!
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be research.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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Perhaps the purpose of categorical algebra is to show that which is trivial, is trivially trivial.
Topic: Miscellaneous
Source: None
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