Carolyn Gold Heilbrun was an American academic and prolific feminist author of both important academic studies and popular mystery novels under the pen name of Amanda Cross.
Women, I believe, search for fellow beings who have faced similar struggles, conveyed them in ways a reader can transform into her own life, confirmed desires the reader had hardly acknowledged - desires that now seem possible. Women catch courage from the women whose lives and writings they read, and women call the bearer of that courage friend.
To recommend that women become identical to men, would be simple reversal, and would defeat the whole point of androgyny, and for that matter, feminism: in both, the whole point is choice.
The Freudian view that accomplished women are sexually men, or trying to be, has done more, I suspect, than any other misconception to doom women to fear of accomplishment and selfhood.