Joan Rivers Quotes, Quotations, and Sayings

7 Famous Quotes by Joan Rivers
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“My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.”
Birth control Quotes
“I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor.”
Exercise Quotes
“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present.”
The present Quotes
“I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery.”
Twins Quotes
“Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly — hurt, bitterness, grief, and, mostof all, fear.”
Anger Quotes
“My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash.”
Babies Quotes
“People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.”
Key Quotes
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